Today is the memorial of St Pius X. I am not particularly devoted to this saint, and the amount of online heresy using his name has turned me off to him. However, I think it’s a good idea to explore, because God has a wicked sense of humor.
St. Pius X was a huge advocate for the reception of the Sacraments, and also promoted the education of the Sacraments and reverence to them. He believed that due reverence to God would preclude the need for war, and saw the outcome of that disrespect and irreverence lead to world war one.
Why I am not a fan is the use of his missal and name to claim that the Church is split, the pope isn’t the pope, and only people who go to the traditional Latin mass are going to the “real” mass. I’m quite sure, knowing that the Church, protected by the Holy Spirit, has declared him in heaven, that he would not want his name to be used to split the Church of which he was vicar. I am partial to St Paul VI, who also promulgated better access to the liturgy, in the vernacular.
But the irony is that St Pius X was a huge advocate for earlier access to holy communion and for frequent reception of the Eucharist. And today, my dad was here to bring the Holy Eucharist. And since I can’t really chew or swallow, he breaks a tiny piece for me, on the guidance of our pastor. And today, that small piece of the Holy Eucharist got stuck in my throat and was choking me.
See, when I have a reaction like a cough or a sneeze, the muscles don’t relax as quickly as normal people. So it closes my airway, and the solution is a raspy, rough inhale. If I have a small thing in my throat, that could go into my lungs, so my body reacts and won’t let me inhale. Basically, I am fighting myself to breathe. I know it freaked dad out!
Why is it ironic? Because God may have literally killed me, on the memorial of a saint that I am not fond of, who advocated for more reception of God in the Holy Eucharist. Come on, you can’t make it up!!! And what a blessed way to die!
I’m alive still, still choking a bit. And I am asking how I can still receive. But I am also going to have a greater devotion to St Pius X, even if he is used improperly because it was probably a sign that I need to not overlook something he wrote or said. Yeah, I believe in signs!